I don’t know if there’s a single day that has gone by, since becoming a mother 15 years ago, that I have NOT ended the day without some bodily fluid on my clothing. Most of the time, this fluid is not my own. And, I have to be ok with that.
In the early baby days, I suppose that’s normal and expected. You change diapers and shit happens (literally). You burp your baby, and they spit up on your shirt. The baby num-nums on your shoulder, getting spit puddles everywhere. All of that is to be expected.
Then, the unexpected. Like while wiping your toddler’s butt, you get poop on your sleeve. Because why didn’t you remember to roll your damn sleeve up before wiping their ass? It’s not like you are a rookie ass-wiper! You’ve been wiping butts, including your own since the 80’s. Yet, there you are, shit on your sleeve, wondering what you should do. Change your shirt? Roll up your sleeve and just continue through the day like you don’t have crap on you? Yes, these thoughts happen. Because sometimes, as a parent, you don’t even have time to change your shitty shirt.
Shit gets on your shirt, and so does snot. You blow their nose on your sleeve because there’s no tissues nearby. Then, seeing this behavior, your toddler now thinks that your clothing is a tissue and blows their own nose on your shirt before you can stop them. They also mindlessly wipe their snot on your leg as they walk by. Like its nothing to toss a booger on you because you are the holder of everything.
Then, your kids get older. Snot gets on you still. But it’s from them crying on your shoulder out of frustration or sadness. And you take that snot because what was your shoulder meant for if not for that? Your tears and snot-soaked shirt is a reminder that you are their resting place…and that’s all good.
And then, there’s your fluids. You spit on your OWN sleeve to clean off faces or that spot you notice on your wall as you walk by. Your spit/sleeve combo actually becomes one of the more frequent cleaning products you use. Because convenience. These fluids are yours, so having them on your clothing is not that strange. But there is a point in your life, I think, where you shouldn’t be having accidents in your underwear. Unless you are a mom apparently….or my husband Vince who has the tendency to shit his pants on a quarterly basis. I’m not joking.
Haven’t shit my pants in a very long time, but ever since having my kids, pee just doesn’t stay where it’s supposed to. The other day, I peed my pants…just a little…but I have no recollection of when this happened. I only know because I went to the bathroom, looked at my pants, and saw a tiny bit of evidence. Even said to myself, “huh…wonder when I did that?” How did my body get to this point when I don’t even realize I pissed myself?!
Overall, I guess it doesn’t really matter. Fluids are just fluids. They aren’t permanent and laundry day is every day in this house.